What People Say

Do you ever sit and wonder what people say about you? Or wonder what they have said about you before or to other people? Or maybe you have just wondered what people really think of you and who you are. I know I have.

I usually start wondering these things for a few different reasons. One - someone else has come up to me and started saying things about another person that I know and then it makes me wonder what they say about me. Two - when someone I don't know or just met comes up and starts saying things like "it's so nice to finely meet you" or "so, your brittney", these makes me wonder what someone has told them, because they have obviously heard of me. And three - when someone comes up to me and says something that I have a hard time agreeing with or something that makes me think about the image I put off to others. The most recent one of these things being number three.

One time that this happened was when i was painting chairs with my mom. We had been sanding, taping, and painting for awhile. At the time, my mom was asking me how my day had gone the day before. I told her that it was fun. I had gone and done a huge service project with my ward the day before. We went and painted houses, garages, and cleaned up a bunch of yards. I told her that i had had a lot of fun doing the work with the people that I did it with. I told her that I had a really good time. The next thing she asked me was "do you ever have a bad time doing anything?" My first response to this was "yeah, of course I do", Then she said "really?" that made me think about it for a second. And in all honestly I really couldn't think of a time when I had a really bad time doing something that I choose to do. This question definitely made me think about myself and what others have noticed about me.

Another time that I had to take a moment to think about how people saw me was when I was talking with my bishop. I had gone to tithing settlement and I had spent I few moments talking to the ward clerks and then to the second counselor. Then the bishop called me in to the office to talk to him and make sure that everything was in order. He asked me about tithing and we took care of all of that stuff. Then he said, "you know, one of the reason that I really like you is that you are fearless" My response was "oh no, I would not say that I am fearless by an means." His response was "oh. I think that you are" My next response "no, I am not fearless, there are plenty of things that I am scared of." then he looked at me and said, "Brittney, I am willing to bet that there are very few things that you truly fear. And that my friend, would make you fearless." That would be a statement that I have thought about ever since he said it. It made me wonder how other people see me. It made me wonder what kind of image I portray to others. But it also made me wonder if it was true. It made me wonder what I truly fear. And I have to say that there are only a few things that I truly fear. Granted, these things are pretty big, a lot of stuff falls under the main categorizes. But, all in all, there are only a few things that truly frighten me.

There are many more times where i have taken a step back and wondered what people think of me. There have been many times when i have wondered what people have said about me and what they have really thought of me. All in all though, I try not to wonder what they think. I figure that I am living my life and if they have a problem with it, well, they can keep it to themselves, or they can tell me. Either way though, I think I am just going to keep on living it.