Here I Go - Dreaming Big

I once heard a quote that said this "Always aim for the stars. After all, isn't it better to aim for the stars and miss by a mile than to aim for a pile of crap and hit it dead center." I have also heard a quote that said this "There is only one truth about forever that really matters, and that is this: it is happening. Right now and every moment afterwords. Everyone has a forever, but given a choice, this would be mine. The one that began in this moment-leaving me astounded, amazed, and most of all, alive."

I have decided that it is time that I choose my forever. It is time that I wake up to the world and start to really live my life again. Don't get me wrong, I have thoroughly enjoyed living my life so far. I really have. I have had some truly great and fantastic times that I would not trade for anything. I just have now come to a moment in my life where it is up to me to determine my forever, and I think that it is about time I took control of it.

All your life you grow up having a plan. It may not include every detail or every moment, but you still have a general idea of what you want to do and where you want to end up. You think about where you want to go to school, what kind of jobs you want to have, who you would like to marry, and so forth. You think of all of these things for your life and you plan them out. Sometimes in your life you have had to make changes to these plans and you have created new ones, but you have still always had a plan. So, what do you do when you have come to the end of your plan? What do you do when you don't know what to do next?

I will tell you, you dream. It takes a while, but you dream. And then you start to put pieces together in your head. You don't necessarily have a new plan, but you are starting to think about one. And I know this because this is what I am doing.

I have come to a place in my life where my plan ends. My plan as a child was to grow up, go to school, graduate form college, get married, have kids, and so forth. My plan has grown, changed, and now come to an end. I will be graduating form college in exactly one month from today. I will have my degree that i have worked towards for five years. For more then five years when you really think about it. You start working towards this clear back in high school. And after that day I have no plan. I have no idea what I will be doing next.

I know what the expected plan is. I know what other people think the plan should be. The expected plan is to interview with local school districts and get a job teaching elementary school here in Utah. I know that plan. But, the thing is.....I don't know if I want that to be MY plan. Part of me wants to use it because it is there and it is easy to follow. But, a bigger part of me wants something else, something more, something great.

Now I don't know if that means moving out of state to teach or traveling a whole new path altogether. I have thought about moving to California or Texas to be a teacher. And I have to say that that dose appeal to me. I have also thought about taking a completely different route altogether. I am not sure what that route is yet, but I am beginning to dream. I figure, I will be done with school, I have no current job, I am single, and I don't have any kids to take care of. I have nothing holding me here. Yes, I have great friends and family that I would miss, but I have the chance to jump. I have the chance to have a great adventure. I have the chance to dream.

So while I do not know what my plan for tomorrow is, I do know that I am beginning to dream. I figure that if I get to be the one to choose my forever, well then I am going to aim for the stars and pray that I learn to fly along the way.