I Took The Plunge

Yes, I took the plunge. I finally decided to try it and see how it goes. I figured, whats the worst that could happen. So I signed up. I created an account and then I found another sight a week later and created one on that sight as well. It has now been a couple of months and I have realized some things about this whole adventure called online dating.

First, let me tell you why I did it. That's the first question you think of right. Why did I sign up. Well, I am 24 years old and would like to get married one day. I was in an LDS sorority for 4 years while at college, I have attended a singles ward for that last 4 years, and at both I have tried to get involved and meet new people and make friends. Which I did, I have enjoyed being a part of it all, but nothing romantic has come from it. I am now graduated from college and working with kids. This means that the college social life is gone as well. Don't, get me wrong, I still hang out with the friends I made, but I no longer have that avenue to meet new people. So her I am, 24 and single. I work with kids, so there are no potential dates there. I don't go to bars or clubs, so that is not an option. Yes, I am still going to the singles ward, but considering that I have been in one for 4 years, we will just leave it at that. So I am down to only a few options of how to meet people. 1) Someone new at the singles ward 2) Through friends and family, which really doesn't happen or 3) Online dating.

Online dating is something that has been on my mind for awhile. For those of you who know me, you know I love to read. In the last few months in a few of the books that I have read they talk about online dating. I have also been coming across other stories and news of people on dating sites and it just seemed to be something that kept coming up in my life. So one day a couple of months ago I started searching some sites out and I ended up joining one and making a profile. I filled out all of the information about myself and what I like to do. I uploaded some photos and then proceeded to check out the other profiles on the site. About a week later I joined another sight and did all the same stuff. And now that I have been on these sights for about two months, there are a few things that I have learned.

*The pool of guys on them is just as scary as the pool of guys at the singles ward. I don't mean this as in they are all bad. Some of the guys on these sights are good and seem normal, but you have to search to find them. While searching you will come across some that make you rethink what you are doing. I don't know how many of you have looked at these sights, but your first impression comes from a screen name, a picture and a few brief sentences about them. And first impressions can say a lot. So when you come across a screen name of  Here4Ladies, Cocoboi, Yourin4atreat, Jackelope, Shockelicious, or Takingitslow who sends you a flirt and turns out to be 44, you tend to get a little scared about who is still single out there. Having said this though, there seems to be some normal people as well. You just have to keep looking.

*It takes effort. Just because you sign up and make a profile, that doesn't mean you are done. all it means is that you are now featured on the sight and people can see your profile. But, if you really want to take advantage of the sight then you have to get involved with it. You have to initiate the search for profiles. You have to be the one to read them and check them out. You have to send flirts and messages saying that you are interested in someone. And on the other side of it you have to be the one to read the messages that you get and reply back to them. You have to get rid of all the people that scare you and the ones you just know would never work out. After a few weeks of not doing much of any of the above listed I have finally decided that it is like anything else in life; you will get back what you are willing to put into it. And if I want to get more out of the sights, then I need to put more into it and spend more time on it. Just like real dating, it takes effort.

*Don't give up. After the first week of being on these sights I was wondering what I had gotten myself into and if it was worth it. I kept wondering if it would pay off and if I would find someone interesting that I would want to meet. And even though I have yet to have something come from this (well, besides a few funny stories and interesting guys in all the wrong ways) I will keep on looking.

*Face time is needed. Online dating is not the one stop shopping center for a partner. It is not a pick a husband sight. It is a get to know someone sight. It is a browse and read and see who interests you sight. It in no way replaces actual dating and actual face time with a person. Face time is still needed and still required. Online is just a stepping stone in getting the process started.

Those are the main things that have been coming to my mind since I started this. I know that I have not been putting in the effort that I should if I really want to get somewhere with this. I know I need to be more proactive and I need to not be afraid to send someone a flirt or a message. SO I will keep on searching, keep on eliminating, keep on reading, and keeping on looking for someone interesting to meet. Because I figure the worst that can happen is that I won't find anyone, which is where I am already to begin with. It can only go up from here.